Avocado Jokes

There are 6.02×10^23 guacas in a guacamole,Which is also known as avocado’s number

What type of music do avocados listen to?Guac & Roll

What’s an avocado’s favorite arcade game? Guac-a-mole

Why shouldn’t you put avocados in your eyes?You could get guacoma.

An avocado farmer has all of his crop stolen and calls the police… Farmer: Someone stole all of my avocados! Cop: How many avocados? Farmer: All of them! Cop: I need an exact number for the report. Farmer: How am I supposed to know how many avocados there are? Cop (annoyed): Just tell me the number of avocados. Farmer: 6.022 times 10 to the 23rd

Saw a falcon eating avocado toast. Guess it’s a millennial falcon.

What did the avocado say to the orange after the orange told him to citrus ass down? You aren’t my mom, you don’t know me until you guacamile in my shoes!

A man has gone on a month-long vacation, leaving his friend to take care of his grandmother, his cat, and the avocado tree in his backyard. A few days into the vacation, the man gets a call from his friend, who says, “Your cat got run over by a car and died.” The man, understandably, is horrified and says that it was too sudden. He tells his friend that what he should do is first, tell him that his cat ran away, then the next day, tell him that his cat got stuck at the top of the avocado tree, and the third day tell him that his cat died. His friend thinks that this is a reasonable request. A week later, the man gets another phone call from his friend. “What?” he asks. His friend replies, “Your grandmother is stuck at the top of the avocado tree.”

Avocado makers need to up their game The only free gift I get is a wooden ball

How do little avocados get what they want? They spread it on thick.

What did the avocado say to the fork? “You guac my world.”

What did one avocado half say to the other? Without you, I’m empty inside!

This guacamole isn’t just good—it’s avocado this world!

I have lots of extra avocados. You want one? Havocado!

How much do I love guacamole? Avocadon’t get me started!

My baby brother already loves guacamole. He’s an avo-kiddo!

make an avocado disappear, say “Avocadabra!”

The number of units in one guacaMOLE of any substance: “Avocadro’s Number.”

I’m trying to learn how to find a ripe avocado. It’s not that hard.

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